A true African-American love story
Once a year I try to name an unusual African-American woman whose actions, I feel, represent those of a true "African-American sister". I hold that title in very high regard; and too frequently, I think, it is bestowed upon women who just as often don't deserve it.
Black men in US prisons, more than any other ethnic group, are denied human status. Most Americans — especially so with a large number of black women — entertain the notion that black men in prison ought not to be valued as potential friends, let alone be the objects of anyone's love interests. It is as if they are saying that we are incapable of rehabilitation or redemption. Fortunately, though not as frequently as needed, a few black women have begun to reject that notion.
Which brings me to the lady this tribute is written for, who I will refer to as Dorothy.
Through her associations with the man's sister, she became the friend of a black man condemned to death. One day Dorothy decided to visit the man. After many visits and phone calls, their friendly relationship blossomed into a sincere and reciprocal love.
Many Americans view Dorothy through the myopic lens of condescension and contempt because she has been moved by compassion and love — as if to suggest being open to those forces, where prisoners are concerned, renders her lacking in self-esteem. Very often those self-righteous people refer to themselves as "Christians". One wonders if they have ever read Matthew 25: 31, 44, 45 and 46.
Dorothy is in charge of her life and many things in the lives of others as well. She is the supervisor at her place of employment. She is the trusted treasurer at the church where she worships. She conducts community seminars, instructing many of her peers in the varied intricacies of sincere community service and development. Dorothy is a very sensitive and spiritual human being who proudly declares that "the Lord" compelled her to visit and befriend this man.
Space does not permit me to go into any detail, but the man managed to acquire a diamond engagement ring. After alerting his sister to his intentions, he and she conspired to surprise Dorothy by arranging a brief visit to the prison. Once inside the visiting room, which was filled with other prisoners and their visitors, he slipped the ring into the bag of potato chips that he and Dorothy were snacking on.
Shortly thereafter, she found it; and, while she was recovering from the shock of that discovery, he took it gently from her hand and slipped it on her finger. He knelt before her on one knee and said imploringly, "This is my way of asking you to be my wife".
Dorothy, quite overwhelmed, managed a soft, "Yes" through her tears.
This is a testament to the beauty of love's ability to breathe life into the dark corridors of state-sponsored murder and death. For this and many other reasons, I consider Dorothy to be "a true African- American sister".
[The writer is a prisoner on death row in the United States. He is happy to receive letters commenting on his columns. He can be written to at: Brandon Astor Jones, EF-122216, G2-51, GD&CC, PO Box 3877, Jackson, GA 30233, USA.]