Poem: Lies, Laurie, Lies

Issue 

Poem: Lies, Laurie, Lies

By Geoff Francis and Peter Hicks

[This song has proved very popular at rallies against the Sydney airport's third runway. Several weeks ago, Peter Hicks sent the text to Laurie Brereton's office, figuring that Laurie could use a laugh. A short time later, Hicks received a phone call from someone claiming to be a member of Brereton's staff. He told Hicks that the song was "an act of violence" against the minister, and that he was going to have them investigated by Special Branch. We therefore hasten to assure any and all police bodies who may be reading that the song is reprinted here in a totally non-violent spirit.]

Let me tell you the story of Laurie the Liar,

With each lie he told he climbed higher and higher,

Prime Minister Keating was really impressed,

"There's a few in my government, but mate, you're the best".

Our Laurie took charge of the third runway plan,

Though he'd called it an outrage and wanted it banned,

But now Laurie got hold of some maps and some pens,

Then he scribbled and he scribbled and he scribbled again.

"See, look at these maps and these noise contour lines,

"They show that the new aircraft flight paths are fine,

"There'll be no noise in Newtown or Camperdown or Glebe,

"Forget all your worries, put your trust in me."

Lies, Laurie, lies,

With each lie you tell you climb higher,

Prime Minister Keating is really impressed,

"There's a few in my government, but mate you're the best".

Admitting a stuff-up, that's not Laurie's way,

A scapegoat was needed and needed today,

"Blame it in on the airlines and the FAC.

"Blame anyone you like, but you mustn't blame me.

"I'll bring in tough new laws, $10,000 fines,

"For any plane that dares deviate from this line,

"And that will stop all of the noise in our skies."

More lies, Laurie, lies, Laurie, lies, Laurie, lies.

Lies, Laurie ...

The anger in Sydney grew stronger and stronger,

"We ain't gonna suffer your planes any longer,

"Tell us the truth and do something at last,

"Or come the next election you'll be out on your arse."

So Laurie the Liar, well he thought and he thought,

And he thought that the residents votes could be bought,

"Generous compensation your way I will throw,

"Well, maybe, perhaps, in 15 years or so."

Lies, Laurie ...

Laurie knew he was in deep shit indeed,

"Another diversion, now that's what I need,

"I'll promise a new airport at Badgery's Creek.

"Then all of the voters will give thanks to me.

"There's nothing in the budget to pay for this plan,

"It's really a lie — but heavens be damned,

"As for telling the truth, well I wouldn't know how,

"And I'm quite an old dog, so I'm not changing now."

Lies, Laurie, lies,

With each lie you think you'll climb higher,

But you're lying your government to a defeat,

And you'll have no-one to blame when you're out on the street.

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