Nostradamus' Media Watch

Issue 

Craig Cormick Based on highly reliable international contacts, leaked documents and horoscopes from several TV magazines, Nostradamus' Media Watch presents a highly accurate forecast of political events across the globe. Nigeria forms new heads of government organisation After being expelled as a member of the Commonwealth Heads of Government association for the execution of 15 political dissidents, Nigeria forms its own heads of government organisation. Nigeria's military ruler, General Sani Abacha, holds the first meeting of HOGM (Heads of Governments (Military)) in Lagos. It is attended by dozens of nations, including Indonesia, Syria, China, and members of several right-wing Israeli extremist organisations. However most delegates go home early when their hotel rooms are ransacked by their military bodyguards. New wave of presidential drop-outs After Colin Powell's approval rating skyrockets after he bows out of the US presidential election, other world leaders attempt to do likewise to boost their flagging popularity ratings. President Clinton announces that he is considering bowing out of the presidential race, slightly ahead of Newt Gingrich, followed by all leading Republican and Democrat nominees. An electoral state of emergency is declared when the only contender not having bowed out is Ross Perot. In Australia, Paul Keating and John Howard both declare that they will not be standing for the US presidential election. And in France, President Jacques Chirac goes on the new Franco-cable TV "L E9 CNN" and announces that he also will not be standing as US presidential candidate — unless the US people request that he do so. The speech is cut with crowd scenes from Spartacus, with hundreds of extras calling for him to be their leader. The US Military, knowing just how many nuclear bombs they have waiting to be tested, revoke his US visa permanently and dispatch several ex-CIA teams, currently working for the English tabloids, to take compromising photographs of him in embarrassing sexual situations with close relatives or small mammals. Cable television boom in Indonesia Indonesia becomes the highest per capita user of cable and satellite television in the world after the government continues banning newspapers and magazines to the point that there are no publications left that are not banned. However, after riots in the streets of Jakarta it relents and allows publication of TV guides.

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