Life of Riley

Issue 

Life of Riley

Batman

His legends are many. The real truth about him we may never know except that he is good, clever, strong and unafraid ... that he and his ancestors have always fought on the side of the weak against the oppressor, and with the good against evil.

He swore an oath to devote his life to the destruction of cruelty and injustice. He pledged his every sinew to serve the good people of Batman. (Or was it: " ... to serve the good people as Batman"?)

"I would like to express my thanks to Martin Ferguson comics. For years I was unable to read. Then my dad bought me a Ferguson comic. My interest was so great I forced myself to read his adventures. Welcome to Batman, Mr Ferguson, you have changed my life." L.M. (11 years), Thornbury.

Batman people have for long been irascible and have not always acted in their own best interests. The locality has always possessed its share of hard liners. When not declaring nuclear-free zones or flying land rights flags from the Northcote Town Hall, the locals take pride in their battles with each other.

"I'm quite new to the Labor Party and while I enjoy being a member, there are some points that puzzle me. For instance, when do we get to fight oppression rather than each other. I'm ready when you are, Mr Ferguson." T.J., Preston.

But they're loyal. The streets of Batman are paved with true believers. They're Labor through and through and could never ever imagine missing an instalment of what the ALP has to offer them.

"In Issue #899A (page 5) Martin Ferguson takes on the bosses at the paper pulp mill in Burnie, Tasmania and forces a return to work. But in #1019 (pages 23 and 24) he does the same thing, this time in Mt Isa. Sorry, but I didn't like either of these stories." B.B., Alphington.

So when Martin Ferguson is visited on Batman, the local people are expectant.

What will Martin do? Or, more to the point, what should he do? There's bad blood aplenty after the recent fracas. People are distrustful and surly. Party morale is at an all time low. Many openly talk of mutiny.

Ferguson comments: "Let me say — without trying to pre-empt official party policy — that I will do the best that I am able ... to allay the fears of both my fellow members ... and those in the electorate who somehow believe ... I am not worthy of them. The thoughts of Martin Ferguson — that's me — are born in my mouth.

"I may not be Greek or a woman, but as my dear old mother used to tell me, 'Martin, you can be anything you want'. So don't spare the souvlaki or the pantyhose, look out Canberra, Martin Ferguson is coming your way. Before long — KAPOW! ZAP! — thy will be done and I will be Batman.

"So don't begrudge me my seat. By the banks of yon Merri Creek will begin my feat."

Dave Riley

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