Poem: A Pair of Appalling Pikers Pollute the Planet

September 23, 2019
Issue 

It’s sound sense that successful statesmen set a summit,

Especially when they have so much in common.

They don’t over-intellectualise, rather they can dumb it,

And neither of them could be described as human.

 

Morrison the amateur is meeting the master

Who excels him in every crooked field,

In narcissism, cruelty, lying more and faster,

Chauvinism, racism and all that these yield.

 

Arrogant American avarice acquires all assets,

Trump knows how to get away with it all,

If he panders to sheer greed in all its facets,

They’ll tolerate his sins, his folly, his gall.

 

The fantasist who fractures and fucks up families

Meets the pseudo-Christian who makes children suffer.

They both lock up children amid two-faced homilies

About national security and who can be tougher.

 

They have more in common than hypocrisy:

Economic ignorance comes to the fore,

You can pull wool over eyes in a democracy,

Blind ideology deceives, fuddles and more.

 

So stupid simplicity circles cynically like the sun,

And expert opinion is blithely overborne,

Trump brags that trade wars are too easily won,

While economists react to this nonsense with scorn.

 

Meretricious meanness mobilises mendacity:

Morrison’s rhetoric trumps sensible action,

The economy’s fading, so in veracity

The government must try to avoid contraction.

 

No sir! A surplus signifies certain success,

“Better than Labor, we must avoid spending

(Except for tax cuts, while the poor face distress).

Economists may bleat, but we’re not attending!”

 

Perhaps one positive point where the PM performs

Is the environment (now please bear with me!).

He at least does nothing, while Trump breaches norms

And actively seeks to foul air, land and sea.

 

Moreover, media manifest mirrored methods:

Trump can’t stand criticism from the press.

Morrison and Dutton too try to beat the odds,

Free speech takes a beating, to even Murdoch’s distress.

 

This dastardly duo deserve dusty derision,

But they won't get it, as po-faced reporting

Covers any Middle East war decision,

Backslapping, bonhomie, alliance cavorting.

 

It’s intensely irritating, but I intuit the intention,

Any Australian leader strives to keep alliance whole,

But beware! Of loyalty Trump has no comprehension:

Friendship with him means mixing the poisoned bowl.

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