Or a chook
"The economy is not taking off like a rocket. It's taking off more like a large plane, gradually gaining altitude. We expect it to stay airborne for some time." — Treasurer John Dawkins.
On the job training
"Well, I'm the prime minister. That's how I became the judge." — Paul Keating, asked how he became a judge of journalistic standards, after it was revealed he agreed to consider an application from Canadian Conrad Black to increase his holding in Fairfax if Fairfax papers provided "balanced" coverage of the federal election last March.
Gaiety
"Estimates suggest that about 50 [people] will become millionaires every year. It will greatly add to the gaiety of the nation." — London Daily Express.
All right: thanks piles
"People who worked for three years for nothing, who masterminded the communications strategy, who masterminded the cultural program, who did all the financial budgeting, never got a thank you and still haven't got a thank you from anybody." — Sydney Olympic bid chief Rod McGeoch, after a $1000-a-plate victory dinner gave more prominence to politicians than to bid personnel.
By evading them, probably
"How does the government expect businesses to operate in a practical sense with these kinds of restrictions?" — The executive director of the NSW Employers' Federation on a new state law prohibiting age discrimination in employment.
Dreamer
"We have an abundance of examples of welfare cheats in the $50,000 range receiving actual prison sentences, but very few examples where tax cheats have received similar dispositions." — Michael Rozenes, Commonwealth director of public prosecutions, advocating the hopelessly utopian idea that people who steal large sums from the government should be penalised as harshly as those who steal small sums from the government.