Goings on in the mall
Wilma Loves Betty; and Other Hilarious Gay and Lesbian Parodies
Edited by Julie K. Trevelyan and Scott Brassart
Alyson Publishers, 1999
323 pp., $11.95
Review by Lynda Hansen
Ever wondered what Wilma and Betty get up to while Fred and Barney break rocks in the hot sun? They spend their day in the mall, not knocking over other wives for the latest summer fashion, that's for sure.
Wilma and Betty flex their credit cards at the local SexToySaurus sex shop. The pair finally decide on the latest dildo on the market, "the Rock Hard 2000, complete with 2000 swarming bees buzzing in the attached sack to give the vibration of a lifetime". Butch of Madison County, Batman and Robin and Xena also get up to some fun.
Of particular note is Susie Day's story "Petunia Farnsworth, First Lieutenant and Proud". The character catches the Godtrain to Heterosville. After joyless years of marching and chanting, she achieves a goal which she was struggling for as a lesbian. The army has asked her to use her expertise in organising gay marches and chants to teach specialised torture training techniques at the School of the Americas.
The book also includes an essential list of "101 Snappy Answers to Nosy, Intrusive and Highly Personal Questions about Lesbians and Gay Men", which everyone should keep in their pocket to face family gatherings.
Wilma Loves Betty contains 43 short stories that soar with witty parody and a wickedly funny gay twist — but that is about as far as it goes.
Apart from a snippet of politics from Lieutenant Farnsworth, little else is done to challenge gay and lesbian stereotypes. In fact, Wilma Loves Betty serves to reinforce the lives of gay and lesbians under capitalism to no more than "what happens in the sack" rather than what should be happening on the streets for gay and lesbian activism.