Life of Riley: Best of all possible parliamentary worlds

Best of all possible parliamentary worlds

Look at that will ya? If you ask me they're a pack of vultures going on, baying at the heels of the pollies.

— What are you on about?

This thing that's happening to the Labor Party. It's tragic, that's what it is, real tragic. All Wayne Swan wants to do is to serve. It's like a calling, like a nurse. Politics is a vocation. You got to be very community-minded to want to go into politics in the first place. You have to be special, you know what I mean?

— Oh, you're special all right.

Don't be like that. It pains me to hear you say that. It's a national past time: let's kick the politicians, let's go after their blood. We're a nation of cynics. But tell me, if it wasn't for the politicians, our professional representatives, who'd show us the ropes, who'd run the show? Without them we'd be headless.

— It's not just this Labor stuff. What about the travel rorts and the phone card scandal and stuff like that. I bet that's just the tip of the iceberg!

There you go again. You gotta take in the big picture. You have to be generous.

— What? Love thy local MP as thy would thyself?

I'm talking about respect. Maybe they err sometimes. Maybe they lose the plot occasionally. But, damn it, they're the nation's finest.

— Why?

Because we elected them. That's what it's all about and for 100 years, every now and then, we get to decide who we want. That's democracy. That's federation. It's freedom of choice.

— And this is the best we can do? After a hundred years of voting and platforms and "choice" , this is what we get?

Yes. It's the best of all possible worlds — a bicameral, federal system resting on preferential voting with universal franchise and a strategically located national capital. A parliamentary democracy: the pinnacle of humanity's worldly achievements.

— Gee. I think you're right. What a horrible thought!

Yep. It doesn't get any better than this.

BY DAVE RILEY
<dhell@ozemail.com.au>

From GLW issue 432